It's been a long time since my last post and a lot has happened since.
Life at IIMA seems half over post summer placements. Got the summer intern at Deutsche Bank.
I think the whole process helped me regain a lot of confidence in myself, the decisions I've taken in life and the person I am.
Don't mean that in an arrogant manner, but it cleared several gray areas for me.
Barely study now, preparing for classes is a joke. Good times are the order of the day.
Went to the Little Kutch desert and to Gir recently. In three days, I saw a sunset on the desert horizon, a lion and then a sunset over the ocean. A three days very well spent and a three days I won't like to forget. The company was amazing on the trips as well, has some awesome times, some serious times, some touchy feely times, tons of arbit times et al.
On the course of the trip, I developed a liking for beedi's (weird I guess). They are pretty nice and cheap. I'm just trying to do some research as to how they compare as a killing machine vis a vis cigarettes. This sort of makes it evident that the quit smoking campaign didn't go that well, but what the hell!!
Coming to what I basically wanted to talk about - Passion.
The trip(s) and a movie later, I had a question nagging me - What is my passion?
Let me define passion for a moment here, partially to clear my head maybe. Passion would be that one thing one wants to do in life. That one thing you could never say no to, that one thing that is a major reason and purpose of your life. The one thing that defines you and your life to a reasonable extent.
The problem - I can't seem to touch upon the thing I'm passionate about.
More importantly perhaps, the life I'm currently living is not one which will get me any closer to finding and pursuing it. I mean, what the hell, here I am doing an MBA, seeking a six figure salary, though thankfully in a field which interests me. This cannot be the purpose of life, I didn't go through all the crap that I have for this.
I spoke to someone close and asked her if she had any idea as to what I might be passionate about. She said - "Everything you do, you put your heart and soul in it and do with passion". Well if that is true I compliment myself and pat myself on the back for such an attitude, but I still lack that ONE passion.
I like a lot of things, don't know if I love any of them enough to make my life something revolving around them.
I spoke to my neighbour here in Dorm, a close friend too, and asked him his passion.
He said "Success". Can success bea passion. Not in my mind, but needless to say, I can be mistaken. That day, I did walk away saying "That's bullshit", and still think on the same lines.
Success is not a concern when you're passionate about something. The most failed dancers, singers, mathematicians, writers can still be passionate about those very things. Passion and success are two separate issues. Further does it even make sense to be passionate about 'success' as a 'thing'?
I'm still full of a lot of questions, trying to figure things out. Lets see where thought leads me.
Would really like you to comment with your opinion especially if you made the effort of reading through all of this.
14 comments:
for me passion is something u keep on doing it coz u njoy doing it or u dnt get dat thing rt in a rt manner..so y nt success a passion?? u dnt get success every tym n ppl do keep on tryin to get dat success..n its njoyable fr them until they get it..they like evry passionate person, give their heart n soul fr it, to achieve it..
The "one thing" in your life.. that is passion.. its something that does not depend on anyone..or anything.. its what you are linked to most... its what links you to yourself most...
@ shivani
in my mind, success in itself is a tad too vague to be a passion. and for something particular, you could be passionate about it even if u suck at it.
and u say in the last line to achieve it. i think achievement is something that doesnt colour the purity of passion. for passion is not about achievement, but just loving 'it'.
@ kasturi
yes i think i agree with you, just that i cant seem to place what that one thing is for me.
thank u for ur comments though, both of you
:)
im probably.. in much the same state as you are ! .. i wanted the success.. i have it. . (lots to achieve though..).. somehow that "something" is missing ! :)
:)
sigh!!!
life i tell you!!!
may b i agree..mayb not..
good going :)
@ Shivani ...okayy
@vivek thank you
I wont define passion, i guess by now thats been cleared out. But what intrigued me was that you asked yourself the question - "whats my passion ?" . In my opinion, this is a question rarely asked, and very few get an answer, and even fewer pursue. I know the feeling of succeeding in what we start to do, giving it our all..and doing a lot of these things, but in the end still not sure where do u want to end up in life. What is that you long for, is it money, is it power, fame .. .. do i want to take up a job, be an entrepreneur .. !! ?? .. the questions just dont end, and i fog them with more and more work.. in hope to find that one thing that ignites a fire within .. my passion.. Lets hope we all find it before we are too far ahead in our lives to pursue it .. !
I like the way you write man. Your words flow nicely and tingle like poetry. I don't know if it comes to you effortlessly? If it doesn't, I guess you are passionate (or a romantic)! I don't know, I don't like being sure of anything.
I dont know what happened on your trip, or what in the movie raised the alarm on passion. I would perhaps think twice before believing in the existence of passion. I am tempted to think that the word is a mere invention. And to my understanding it means an activity which I will do with awareness,intent and interest; and elation is due with successful completion of the task. Therefore, I think it is safe to call passion an emotion.
I wonder if an ancient man will have a passion? Due to civilization too many things and ideas have sprung up in front of a human. And I think a human being is now just a composition of reactions to what we see and hear. And from what I know through my personal experience, every emotion ceases and recurs. Happy, sad, angry, anxious, compassionate, passionate...I see them like hours on a clock, And the time of life ticking through each hour at once. I am not here commenting here to show you the real meaning of passion or any other jazz like that. I just want to congratulate you as you aware enough to understand impermanence associated with it.
@ Sharvil.
True, we spend a lot of our lives doing this and that hoping something will click. But somehow what I'm doing right now - I feel it's far more due to insecurity then the possibility of finding my passion.
@ God.
Thank you for the compliment firstly. Secondly, I must say you write brilliantly yourself.
The concept of passion being a emotion struck me as different and definitely possible. But I would perhaps rephrase it to say passion ignites an emotion in us that no other thing can. Thus perhaps it is equivalent to that very emotion.
About how civilisation might be 'causing' this, I'd never have thought of that but I couldn't agree more.
And yes, the impermanence, the all permeating futility if I might call it that is THE most characteristic feature of things now a days.
My passion is writing and thus clearing the clutter in my head or belly sometimes :)
Well its a subjective matter so you may never get one answer to your question but my passion is ingrained in my nature and course of action...i am neither aroused or excited by it but now and then it wants to come out of me and when the time is right it does.
But whatever the passin may be it definitely relieves you and brings peace.
I believe passion as a concept should have more fervour to it, as in I see it as something stronger.
a very interesting post :)
i know dis reply cums late, dont know if u hav found ur passion or not, but here goes..
i guess a passion cud be any activity dat wud consume you entirely, in dat it wudn't matter even if u were pursuing it at the expense of evrythin else.. it wud be like an obsession, u cud keep doing it forever widout gettin bored or tired
i'm not sure if u can find or look for a passion, i hav always thought it just happens to someone, it simply grows on u like a strong love
as far as the matter of success goes, i wud think passion is more of a process, while success is kinda an end result... success is also, i believe, fleeting whereas a passion is a long journey u hav
all i can say is, try ur hand at every possible thing, no matter how strange or crazy, if not anything u will cherish the experience :)
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