Friday, November 28, 2008

Passion

It's been a long time since my last post and a lot has happened since.
Life at IIMA seems half over post summer placements. Got the summer intern at Deutsche Bank.
I think the whole process helped me regain a lot of confidence in myself, the decisions I've taken in life and the person I am.
Don't mean that in an arrogant manner, but it cleared several gray areas for me.
Barely study now, preparing for classes is a joke. Good times are the order of the day.

Went to the Little Kutch desert and to Gir recently. In three days, I saw a sunset on the desert horizon, a lion and then a sunset over the ocean. A three days very well spent and a three days I won't like to forget. The company was amazing on the trips as well, has some awesome times, some serious times, some touchy feely times, tons of arbit times et al.

On the course of the trip, I developed a liking for beedi's (weird I guess). They are pretty nice and cheap. I'm just trying to do some research as to how they compare as a killing machine vis a vis cigarettes. This sort of makes it evident that the quit smoking campaign didn't go that well, but what the hell!!

Coming to what I basically wanted to talk about - Passion.
The trip(s) and a movie later, I had a question nagging me - What is my passion?
Let me define passion for a moment here, partially to clear my head maybe. Passion would be that one thing one wants to do in life. That one thing you could never say no to, that one thing that is a major reason and purpose of your life. The one thing that defines you and your life to a reasonable extent.
The problem - I can't seem to touch upon the thing I'm passionate about.
More importantly perhaps, the life I'm currently living is not one which will get me any closer to finding and pursuing it. I mean, what the hell, here I am doing an MBA, seeking a six figure salary, though thankfully in a field which interests me. This cannot be the purpose of life, I didn't go through all the crap that I have for this.
I spoke to someone close and asked her if she had any idea as to what I might be passionate about. She said - "Everything you do, you put your heart and soul in it and do with passion". Well if that is true I compliment myself and pat myself on the back for such an attitude, but I still lack that ONE passion.
I like a lot of things, don't know if I love any of them enough to make my life something revolving around them.
I spoke to my neighbour here in Dorm, a close friend too, and asked him his passion.
He said "Success". Can success bea passion. Not in my mind, but needless to say, I can be mistaken. That day, I did walk away saying "That's bullshit", and still think on the same lines.
Success is not a concern when you're passionate about something. The most failed dancers, singers, mathematicians, writers can still be passionate about those very things. Passion and success are two separate issues. Further does it even make sense to be passionate about 'success' as a 'thing'?

I'm still full of a lot of questions, trying to figure things out. Lets see where thought leads me.
Would really like you to comment with your opinion especially if you made the effort of reading through all of this.